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So, I wrote/typed this up Sunday, but decided to wait and post to ye ol' LJ until Monday... Well, what happened on Monday was that my ISPs PC wouldn't respond to mine - the problem is now fixed, but it's also officially Tuesday now. However, I am determined to get this over and done with, so I'm up late doing so. The good news is that I don't have to work tomorrow, so I can sleep in if I want.

Anyway, at the end of last season I had planned to do a recap style review for Supernatural's season five finale, but after doing one for The Vampire Diaries season finale I was feeling lazy. Still it was in the back of my mind to do one for Supernatural, but until now I just hadn't loved any of the season six episodes enough to want to explore them THIS up close and personal. I didn't hate most of them, just didn't truly love them either.

Yes, I loved this episode, though I did find a less then stellar moment or three. What to find out what I think those are? Follow me into the recap style review:

We start this episode with Crowley torturing Crowley - Yummy, me like. Okay, fine, Crowley isn't really torturing himself, he's torturing the alpha shapeshifter who's shifted to look exactly like him.
(I'm hoping that by showing Crowley killing him means that killing the alpha won't make all the turned one revert back to normal, because I believe I've mentioned how much I totally loathe that idea.)

But what I really like about that whole scene, even more than the Crowley on Crowley action is that both of them are just so coldly awesome. Crowley wants what he wants, but the shapeshifter isn't about to give it up, and instead of being all overwrought and overly dramatic it's just cold. Again, me likey.

Really the only bad part of the whole thing - once again Supernatural pussed out when it comes to killing babies/children.

Now we come to Dean and Sam delivering some poor creature to Crowley, or at least Crowley's minions. Apparently, Charlie has taken to avoiding his two best angels. Lets see how that's going to bite him on the ass.

But for the moment, I'm just going to be all WHOA over that demon extra totally pwning Dean's ass. "I don't speak (whinny) little bitch."

"Dean, darlin' you really gonna just let him get away with that?"
(*sigh* It would seem so.)

After toddling back to where ever and what ever this weeks lair of DOOM is, Dean is just going to stand around complaining about being pwned by demon - possibly for days, he seems like he's just working up to a good rant. *le sigh*

Okay, seriously, I'm not a Dean!girl, but enough with this crap! Bring back the Dean who took action, not the one who's just gonna stand around and bitch about it all with his mighty man panties in a twist.

NOW, show! I am not even close to kidding. Do NOT make me start killing Lisa over and over again, because I will, I'll go back to an idea I had where each week I'll come up with a different way to kill her, and I will keep doing this until you give us back badass Dean. Don't you even think I won't go there, because this crap has gone on way to long. And you know the Dean I wanted back - the one who might have at moments longed for a life outside hunting, but deep down knew that hunting was what he really wanted to do, because, hey, hunting has it's perks. I WANT THAT DEAN BACK, NOW! So, I say again, show, give Dean his mother fuckin' balls back, or I will start my "1001 ways to off a bitch" story!
(PS - No, I don't hate all the women of Supernatural (I want Anna the angel, Ellen, and Jo back NOW PLEASE!) I just really hate Lisa, and honestly I didn't start out hating her, but now I firmly blame her for stealing (and apparently hiding away) Dean's manly bits.)

Anyway, while I was bitching about Dean being all MIA, it turns out Sam has gone MIA. I was starting to think he'd just left, cause maybe he's as tired of listening to Dean bitch as I am, but no turns out he just left the room to find himself knocked out. Dean soon follows.

So, Sam and Dean wake tied to chairs and facing each other. SO, much for "I cannot be contained" Sam. Anyway, there's Demons, and apparently they want to talk, or at least mate with Dean, whatever.

Anyway, I'm (finally) really liking this Meg - what is it with me and demons part two? At first I never like the second actor/actress and then (at some point) end up really liking them (the same thing happened to me with Ruby.)? What I mean is that I loved the original Ruby, but then Ruby II just didn't work for me, at first, but then suddenly I came to a point where I started to love her to. Well, the same thing is now happening with Meg 2.0 - I thought I'd be loyal to blond Meg forever, but now I'm starting to think NuMeg won't be so bad.

Weird, huh?

"Satisfy me, or I please myself." I'm stealing that line. Seriously, at some point I will be using that one in real life, hopefully while being all scary like Meg and holding a knife.

Anyway, Sam makes a pretty good effort at pwning Meg, though I still think maybe Meg doesn't kill them cause she wants to at least do one of them before she offs them. But that's just a little pet theory of mine, or maybe I'm spewing my issues all over Meg - whatever.

I'm a really bad girl sometimes, and seriously I like my Dean all toppy, really there's only a few pairings where I like bottom!Dean - still I can't help but love all the little hints we're getting of how things may or may not happened with Dean in hell, things I've personally long suspected... Which may mean I'm reading shit into this where maybe shit shouldn't be read into it, but that's just the way I roll, dog. Still my favorite Dean pairing is and always shall be Dean/Chief (Yeah, you remember the Chief, you know you do, and the only non-posessed human I can honestly see topping Dean) closely followed by a tie between Dean/Alastair and Dean/Bela - Don't judge me, bitches! - it really just depends on the mood I'm in.

And, oh, yay! More bitchy Dean, which is exactly what this show needed. Yeah, for those who couldn't tell THAT was sarcasm.
(At least Sam seems as tired of bitchy Dean as I am. Okay, no, he doesn't seem as tired of it as I am, but he does seem to find it tedious, and manages to nip it in the bud.)

And then... Oh, Sam lies to Cass just to get him to show up, which is interesting to me, since back in season four Cass used a tactic somewhat like this to get Dean and Sam to show up and save a Reaper.
(I'm not sure how I feel about Sam getting all "bitch, please" on Cass, but I didn't hate it, at least I don't think I did.)

Anyway, after a penis measuring contest it would seem Cass has agreed to help. Does this mean the Cass-lite episodes are coming to a close? Perhaps.

So, they start trying to find Crowley, and I think they've broken into Grandpa Sam's lair. Oh, this should end well, and yep there's Grandpa maybe evil now.

And here's the thing the show goes overboard here (like most shows do), so you just know that Grandpa is either going to sell the boys out or he's going to end up dead by the end of the episode. At this point, I'm not sure which way I'm hoping.


Anyway, Grandpa confirms what practically everyone has guessed - wow the mystery this season is sure impossible to unravel, and that's why it pisses me the hell off that I still can't come up with a workable theory!
(Possibly because it's somewhat hard to determine what moments to base a theory on. For example, a couple episodes ago, Cass was not only in the room with a demon posessed human (Christian) but was looking right at him and didn't see the demon. So, that lead to thinking that Cass was working with demons/Crowley, but with this episode Cass working with demons doesn't seem like a workable theory, which means that whole Cass staring straight at but not seeing was simply a mistake.
So, things like that make it hard to know what things a workable theory should be built on.


Um, so, anyway, he's doing it for Mary, because while the boys have learned to live without her (or in Sam's case never knew what it was like to live with her in the first place) Grandpa can't do it. Which does work, I mean John (through Dean) finally got revenge on the thing that killed her, so Grandpa doesn't even have the revenge thing to hold him. I mean I get why he wants to bring her back, I do, but it seems that he's forgotten that she was in the process of trying to escape from him from the hunting life. So, I doubt she'd be thrilled to have him bring her back.

Okay, I'm "interluding" here, because while I think I understand what the show is going for with Grandpa Evil wanting his daughter back, honestly it's played much more creepy then it should've been forit to be just a normal father's love for a child. Seriously. It's like Mary was his whole world (even more so then his wife), and thanks to this episode I can't help but wonder if hunting was all Mary was trying to get away from back in the day.

(After all, sick thought, she didn't seem all that upset about having to kiss her daddy's meat to seal the demon deal to bring John back to life.)

And now having creeped myself out with those thoughts, I now return you to the scheduled recap review. But at least maybe this will help explain (later) why I am so totally okay with Dean killing Grandpa, in fact I sincerely hope we see that happen now.

Anyway, the scene is over... *sigh* Despite what you think, we haven't seen the last of Grandpa this episode, whether we've seen the last of him this season remains to be seen.

P0RN! That's right, now we come to a delightful little scene, that I probably shouldn't like as much as I do, but I love it.

Cass is watching p0rn (just because it was there), and finding it very complex.
(And somehow I was reminded of Xander from Buffy way back in the first season (I think) where Xander comes upon cheerleaders practicing and feels as though it's a spiritual experience. Seriously, don't ask me why one scene reminds me of the other, cause I don't really know why myself.)

Anyway, Cass is treating the "story" the way I do a lot of stories (though not generally p0rn) and very seriously over-thinking it, which is clearly making Sam and Dean (and I assume Dean more than Sam) uncomfortable. So much so that Dean finally blurts out "you don't watch p0rn in a room full of dudes. And you don't.... talk about it."

Oh, I don't know, Dean, I believe I beg to differ...

Still the best part - Cass gets a boner.

*sigh* Now I'm starting to have naughty thoughts about Cass, please help me. So far he's been the one male Supernatural character that I've managed not to have naughty thoughts about.

Ah, thank you, Grandpa Skinner, back in the day you would've only added to my naughty thoughts, but now a days you just aren't doing it for me, I don't really know why. Okay, fine, it's probably because I liked Skinner (sexy bitch, he was), and I'm still very iffy on Grandpa (and if I'm iffy, I just can't be attracted, I think it's a girl thing).

Anyway, Dean opened the door and there he was to dry my wetness, and that was when I realized he's selling them out. This episode isn't sitting him up to die, but sitting him up to betray the boys.

"I'm not supposed to talk about it."


Anyway, Grandpa has shown up with what amounts to the location of Crowley, or at least Crowley's alpha prison, and that just reeks of "it's a trap! All craft prepare to retreat! It's a TRAP!"(I suppose he gets a few points for at least wishing (aloud, to their faces) that they wouldn't do this.)

Ah, and here's the first hints of Mass (Mass is the shipname I made up for Cass/Meg - I do that sometimes when I get bored or whatever)...

Then it gets a little downery with all the penis measuring, but finally Sam kills some demons (with the demon killing knife) and decides he's keeping the knife.

And then I assume it's off to Crowley's house/den of torture we go!

Ooops, no, we're back to Cass and Dean, and Cass finally gives voice to something I started to wonder the moment Sam's soullessness was revealed. Is getting Sam's soul back truly a good idea? *sigh* I'm actually disappointed that Dean didn't get all "I don't care, I'm not leaving Sam's soul to suffer any more then it all ready has, not if I can help it!"
(Ah, and I'm back to loving and wishing and hoping for Sam/Cass - that's right, you can have you're dirty old Mass, I want my hot young Sass!)

Anyway, yes, Dean does get bitchy in that scene, and basically browbeats Cass into agreeing, because I think Cass was ready to leave the soul out of a body and cling to the only "whole" part of Sam left...

*coughs* Um, sorry, I was thinking about Cass clinging to one of Sam's body parts (and I think you know which one) and I sorta got distracted.

Now where was I? Oh, right, more Sass (I loves me some Sass hints.).

Anyway, finally, we're off to Crowley's den o' torture, and then we're inside, but not before Dean and Sam talk about how totally too easy all this is. *sigh* I done told you both "it's an effing trap! Why don't you two ever listen to me?"

So, it's a walk through, were things beg to be released, until finally HELLHOUNDS. YAY! Some action, at last!

Damn commercial!

And they're running, slamming doors and spilling salt, and Dean finally spouts that he knew this was a trap. You know, I don't believe that at all - totally clueless about that every last one of them. Idjits!

Anyway, Meg tries to escape only to find that she's trapped in her meat. And I personally just love the way that sounds. Sue me, I'm twelve! Today, anyway.

And here's the scene I know a certain friend of mine was waiting for - Meg kisses Cass, and I think I see what she's doing there, so it's not really an "I want you" kiss, but an "I want that weapon you've got there" kiss, which is not all that shippy.

On the other hand, Cass still apparently horny from the p0rn grabs her and suddenly it's some against the wall kissing. And once again I'm loving the way Dean reacts. HeHe Awesome!
(Sam's reaction was okay, but since he's soulless, it wasn't as extreme as Dean's.)

FINALLY Cass pulls back, and seems stunned to find everybody staring at him. "He learned it from the pizza man."

At least it would seem the pizza man is a good teacher, because Meg suddenly feels all clean and fresh.


Then she's fighting hellhounds...

Dean, Sam, and Cass or walking, until there's a bright light, and I see you there Grandpa Evil, and Cass is now gone. Interestingly Grandpa Evil uses a different angel-be-gone sigil from the one that's been previously used on this show.

Ah, and here's Crowley again, and I think he's being a tad cocky here, telling the boys that they won't be alive to enjoy his victory or whatever. Seems a tad cocky.

Anyway, the boys are locked in separate cages, and my mind may have (just for a moment) confused p0rn with reality.

So when I came back we was with Meg killing the last of the hellhounds before getting knocked on her ass by Christian, and having her stolen angel blade taken by him.

Ah, and then we're back to the cages and my fantasy is killed when Dean decides to share with the class that he thinks he's standing in pee. It's made worse when Sam says that means he's (Dean) lucky.

Gross! I wanted caged heat, not caged excrement.

Then Grandpa Evil stops by to gloat. You know, I thought people saying he didn't like Dean might've been overreacting, now I'm thinking not so much (though I guess for Grandpa it's more fun to taunt Dean since Sam has no soul). But I think Grandpa really doesn't like Dean, and I admit that if the show tries to welch on Dean killing Grandpa Evil... Well, somebody will have to pay. You hear me, show? Dean hasn't had much to do this season, but you best let him be the one to kill Grandpa, or I'm gonna get cranky.
(I think maybe I was supposed to be sympathetic to Grandpa here, but I couldn't manage it. See my interlude above to help explain why. Seriously, all I want is for Dean to slit his damn throat! You hear me, show! DEAN SLITS GRANDPA'S THROAT! That's how that part of the arc ends.
And the fact that I have something of a hard-on for kinda!evil!Dean has very little to do with this Christmas wish of mine.

And moments after Grandpa finally evils away, two demons come to take Dean somewhere. Sam listens as they drag him away, but I give Sam a pass for not helping this time, since he's in a cage himself. Still another strike against Sam's whole "you can't contain me" speech, because he's been contained just fine twice in this episode.

Now we come to Meg getting the Ruby treatment, but I have to say Christian is no Alastair.
(And once again we get naked female treatment here... Yes, I'm still bitter about Sam not being naked WAY back, and will continue to be so until we get some hot action naked tortured Sam - or Dean - what can I say? I'm flexable.)

Then back to Sam, who I think is drinking his own blood. Man, this is getting weird.

Dean's shoved into a room, a rather big empty(ish) room all by himself. Ah, then two human looking things are brought in. Dean snarks, and one the "humans" snarks back about breakfast. Ghouls, maybe.

When we come back from break the demons have come to remove Sam from his cage, but instead of drinking his blood, Sam used his blood to draw a devil's trap on the ceiling, which I have to admit is just a little bit awesome.

Back to Dean fighting for his life. And, hey, I was right, they are ghouls.

Sam running calling for Dean, then back to Dean fighting. Back to Sam bursting through the doors and saving Dean. Okay, just helping, since Dean probably wasn't yet in mortal peril.

And back to Meg for some more torture, and while she snarks you can tell what he's doing hurts. Then she starts laughing which strikes me weird until Christian is stabbed with the demon killing knife.

Dean just saved Meg, that should totally make his day. LOL

Anyway, we jump to Crowley walking through some hallway having a drink. He stops hoping he'll find one of his prisoners chatty, but the fire alarm goes off before he can get anywhere. He tracks it to the source and finds Christian dead, and Dean turns off the alarm.

Despite what he says, Crowley doesn't seem that shocked to see Dean alive. Anyway, Sam knocks him on all fours, and I shiver in anticipation, cause this might be hot for me.

Damn! Crowley's back on his feet, but then Meg enters the room, and she gets a bit badass in hurting him. I admit I usually like blood with my torture, but somehow thinking about Meg hurting without touching is interesting.

Then we're back to "I want my soul back, idjit!"

Ooops, sorry, that was Weekend at Bobby's, but it's still basically the same song, only without the Crowley snark that made that episode good.

Crowley says no.

Dean says, "Meg."

Who steps forward and puts another hurt on Crowley, and I wonder if we might finally be getting somewhere. I expected her to be a little more unhappy taking orders from Dean, but I guess if its orders she wants to follow that works for her, and so it works for me. "Sic him, Meg."

"I can't," Crowleys says.

"Can't or won't?" asks Sam.

"I said "can't"," replies Crowley, and I realize that I was a little bit right. Apparently, Crowley had the juice to get the body out but not the soul. Huh? It still doesn't make sense. Why would Crowley want Sam (any part)? I still say Sam's body was simply bumped from the cage, and Crowley being the enterprising sort of fellow he is took advantage.

Anyway, turns out Crowley agrees with Cass (I wonder is hell freezing over?) that Sam's soul might not be in pristine condition.

So, Sam decides that he's done here, and tells Meg that Crowley's all hers while I lean back yelling "Now wait just a damn minute here!"

Oh, and here's Dean agreeing with me, until Dean hands the demon killing knife over to Meg.

"You bastards. You won't do it. You don't have the balls to off Crowley."
(Is what I screamed (and wrote on my paper), which in light of the way things ended I started to remove from the typed version, but fairs fairs, and first reactions and all.)

Anyway, Crowley's in a devils trap, and in a weird twist Meg seems to trust that the boys will let her back out, after she steps in to deal with Crowley.

"I doubt it, Meg," I say planning to snark, but she's getting to damn close to Crowley with that knife for my comfort.


Crowley knocks her on her ass, and frees himself from the devils trap. "That's my boy, right there."

He uses his powers to fling Sam and Dean aside, and finally I think we're about to get some hot slash action when what happens? No slash, that's for damn sure.
Meg gets back on her feet, but Crowley has the demon knife on her. Then Cass is back, so I guess the different angel-be-gone thingie wasn't really anymore powerful just different.

Anyway, Cass has a bag with him, a bag of bones Crowley bones to be precise, and I see what's happening.

(Okay, I didn't actually cry, but I may or may not have yelled a big hearty NOOOO!)

But then hope, they start talking about heaven, and how Cass is losing, and now I feel really bad for Cass, and may now be willing to agree with the Cass!girls in that Dean needs to give his profound bond boy a hug.

But hope is a bitch, when Crowley asks what's in the bag, my hope flees, because Cass responds (holding up a skull), "you are," confirming my horrible suspicions.

And I really know what's coming now, and I can't believe you are really doing it, show. You really are going to off Crowley, aren't you. BITCH!

Okay, wait, one chance, quick Crowley, tell Cass you can do, tell him you can restore Sam's soul. Please!

Crowley releases Sam and Dean from his magical hold them against the wall power, and I think he's about to make me one very happy girl, but alas noooooooooo! Cass doesn't even use a lighter, he just tilts his head and the bones explode in to flames, and you know what happens to Crowley.


And, seriously, the show must love killing Crowley, because it takes forever. No, I know, it's not that they love killing Crowley it's that someone is taking great delight in tearing my bleeping heart out of my chest.

And show isn't done torturing me, but first Meg escapes, and is safe for another episode.
(Alas, I do wish Cass had gotten his hour with Meg, even if the big doofus doesn't seem to understand why Dean would've done it.)

And before the show rips my heart out again, we have Cass admitting that things aren't going well for him upstairs, and the Dassy's come as close as they're probably going to get to Dean saying he's sorry here. Hmmm, Mass works, Sass works, but Dass, not so much.

Cass also admits that he'd rather spend time with Dean (and hopefully Sam) then be fighting his war, so I think we're probably going to start seeing more Cass now. However, before Cass leaves, Sam makes a good suggestion that being that Cass do something about the monsters - they can't leave them there, but they can't just let them go either. Cass sets off to take care of it.

And little did I know I should've changed the channel right then and there, but I did not.

So, after Cass takes off, Dean tries to be all upbeat and hopeful about finding another way, but Sam... *cries* Sam's done, and I see where he's coming from, I do, when angels and demons agree... Yeah, but DAMN YOU, soulless Sam Winchester! Don't you walk away like that. Get your ass back there, bitch!

*sigh* At least the CW is giving me another episode of this show, and not leaving me with a terrible horrible long wait off that ending. And boy do the promos for the next episode look interesting.

I mean, look, Sam, I get it, Bobby annoys me sometimes too, but you're going a little overboard there.
(And I'm hoping they'll play Dean is Death thing more serious then comical.)

PS - In addition to getting a recap style review from me 'Supernatural' has also won the TVGuide cover vote contest!
Here's a link to the video on YouTube - I never could get the video from the CW site to load, but thanks to the kind soul who uploaded to YouTube I was finally able to watch.
I enjoyed your recap - very amusing :)

And yes...I didn't think that they had the balls to off Crowley and when Cas asked him if he could bring Sam back I was practically shouting at my TV for Crowley to lie. But, le sigh, it did not end well for my favorite villain :(
I admit that killing Crowley is one of the few things this show has done that left me flat stunned.

Anyway, glad you commented. ;)