So, keeping in mind that I haven't seen the "remake" of Halloween II (which is coming out today/tonight), but here are my comments on things I would have liked to seen the "remakes" tackle instead of making Laurie Strode insane or at least quickly losing sanity.
I also freely admit that I have NOT seen Halloween Six, nor have I yet seen Halloween H20, both are on my Netflix list, but they keep getting pushed back by other movies I want to see more.

Anyway, this "rant" started building when movie channels started rerunning (or debuting) the original movies. Now I know this is going to make me sound like a Halloween purist or whatever they're called, but the very first Halloween is (and probably always shall be) the best. There's just something very scary about that first movie that even the original Halloween II couldn't match, though admittedly the original Halloween II does better than some of the later ones.

Now before I continue I want to say that I don't really have a problem with portraying Laurie Strode as borderline insane, it just didn't really work for me. Nor, for that matter, did trailertrash!Michael work for me. Keep in mind that I an NOT in the group of people who believe that Michael's motivation should have never been explained, but I think Zombie completely missed the entire motivation that was plainly laid out over the series between Halloween and Halloween Five (H5 in my opinion really laid it out - homeboy just wants some lovin', and by that point any gal would do, more in a bit). The boy wanted his sister (yes in that skanky incest way), and killed the first one when she started getting "skanky" with someone who wasn't him.
To be fair, I do think in his own way Zombie did get the idea behind Michael going after Laurie, but he couldn't seem to stop himself from making the whole thing trailer trashy when it didn't need to be. Incest, it isn't just trailer trash who do it!

Seriously, though in the first movie, at one point, (actually two, I think) Michael is standing right behind Laurie when he swings his knife and misses... Yeah, right, and it's for that reason that I've always believed all the things he done was his twisted way of wooing her. (He is nuts, after all, so I think he was saying "I want to poke you.") And then when she pretty much rejected him in Halloween II he went for the actual kill.

But before I go to LJ cut, I'll tell you the main thing that I would have loved to see the "remakes" actually address, rather than making Laurie half crazy and Michael trailertrash is the weird relationship Michael seemed to have with Doctor Loomis. I'll admit that I've wondered this since the very first movie, but admit that in the first and second movies it really doesn't stand out all that much. However, by the forth and fifth movies Michael actually goes out of his way numerous times to avoid killing Loomis. WHY? That's what I had hoped the remakes might attempt to address, because it is one of the few things the originals never really gave enough detail about. Honestly, Michael's "mission" would have been made ten times easier without Loomis rushing to Haddonfield to warn everyone, and Michael was (outside of that) very good at getting rid of people who stood in his way.

Part of the reason the original Michael was/is scarier than the remake Michael, or even the latter original Halloween movies is that originally Michael didn't just kill everyone who crossed his path - somehow that scared me more than if he'd just killed everyone. I guess because it did add something of a sense of mystery. I also liked that Michael wasn't a big hulking monster of a man, and I loved that if Michael had removed the mask and wore normal clothing he could have easily been just another normal face in the crowd. Again, though that isn't just a flaw of the remakes because the sequels started to follow the Michael just kills kills kills route.

Now (finally) back to my comment about homeboy just wanting a girlfriend. In Halloween Five he has Tina in the car with him, and could have killed her any time he wanted, but on her insistence he actually stops and lets her out of the car, which is pretty much the stupidest thing (outside of letting Loomis live) Michael could do, and as I've said before most of the time Michael while insane is NOT stupid. That's when (originally) I started believing all these half thoughts about why he killed his older sister and why he went after Laurie were correct. Michael just wanted love, and because he wasn't quite (understatement) right in the head he wanted love from his sisters. Once they were gone I think he was just looking for love, and I think that's why he stupidly stopped the car and allowed Tina to get out - I think for one shinning moment he actually believed that she was really his girlfriend - I mean that's pretty much the only thing that explains why he would have allowed her to get out of the car and potentially escape him, which of course she did, though it was more the "fault" of the cops than any brilliance on Tina's part, cause honestly that chick was dumb as a post, dumber even.

Yes, I know that some of my theories take a beating when it comes to Jamie (the niece from Four and Five), because it is hard to fit her into this. She's a bit to young to be his bride, and he also seemed more seriously devoted to killing her than he was Laurie. So, this is all I got, perhaps after having been rejected by the sisters he decided to wipe their "skank" off the planet.

PS - Yes, even though I have not seen the sixth movie I do know a bit about the story, enough to know it screws with all my theories, but I am happily ignoring that because I arrogantly believe I make more sense than it does.


I see you are starting to understand why I stopped at Five originally (though sometimes I feel I should have stopped at Four). But I do finally plan to watch Six, if I don't start bogarting the Netflix it should happen sometime next month, also when I expect to finally watch Halloween H20, which I suspect I'll find more to my taste than Six even if HH20 ignores 4, 5, and 6.

PPS - I suppose you can also see that I've always been kind of anal when it comes to my theories, unless the show/movie/book comes up with something better (which does happen on occasion, but), and in this case Halloween did not.

UPDATE: *sigh* In the end, I think Rob Zombie would have been better off working on the Friday the 13th remake(s) instead of the Halloween remakes. After Halloween II it appears that Zombie has his movies confused - Michael Myers is a completely different character from Jason Voorhees. Yes, they both wear a mask and kill an impressive amount of people, but that is the extent of their likeness, yet Zombie doesn't seem to think so. *sigh* Hey, Zombie, Michael always seemed to be working toward some (evil) goal all on his own, unlike Jason, who was simply a good ol' boy defending his land while trying to impress his (dead) mother with his over the top kills.
(Which makes sense since in the first Friday movie even his mother was a bit creative with her kills.)